The 3 days I'll Never Forget - Day 2
Day 2 continued from previous post.
Monday September 12, 2016
As I sat in the school parking lot, I stared at my phone hesitant to answer it. I was holding my breath with a huge pit in my stomach. It was Wylie's boss calling. He has called before, but normally it was for Wylie when he couldn't reach him. This time though I knew he was with Wylie, so why was he calling me? I answered, he was slightly panicked and told me Wylie had a seizure at work. The paramedics were there and needed some information from me. "Are you serious?" was the only response I could get out. Which of course he was serious, why else would he be calling? The paramedics came on the phone and needed his personal info. I asked if he was awake, they said he was starting to come around and told me what hospital they were taking him to. His boss got back on the phone and I can't really remember what he told me at that point b/c there were a million things racing through my mind. I rushed in to pick up Son #1, while calling my neighbors to see if they could watch the boys, until I could make other arrangements. I'm so lucky to be blessed with such great neighbors who were more than willing to help out and would take care of everything with the boys. After I hung up with them, we were walking down the hall at school and Son #1 could tell something wasn't right and started asking what was going on. I honestly can't remember what or how much I told them about what was going, b/c I didn't want him to worry. Son #1 is worrier like the Before Me and we'd both sometimes worry to the point where we'd make ourselves almost sick. Son #2 who was only 4 years old the time, could pick up on the vibes from his brother and also wanted to know what was going on. Trying to prevent all of this, I'm fairly certain I gave them enough info to subside the questions, not intice any worrying and promising to call later.
After dropping them off, I jumped on the interstate. (which runs right by our town, thank god!) and floored it. I knew I needed to call his parents: his Dad and Mom & Step-Dad. I know I couldn't hide the panic in my voice or stop the tears as I talked to each of them. After I hung up with them, I noticed I was doing 85-90 MPH. I was quite impressed that in my current state I was able to drive that fast and talk on the phone. Now that I was focused, I was weaving in and out of traffic like a race car driver. I remember thinking that I needed to tell Wylie later about how awesome of a job a I did driving and that I could in fact be a NASCAR driver. For Christmas a few years before I had gotten Wylie a gift certificate to drive a real race car at the Iowa Speedway. He was always saying how men are so much better drivers than women b/c men knew how to drive offensively. I'm sure anyone reading this right now who was familiar with Wylie's driving, is getting a good laugh at that! (There are many stories that can be told about his driving, but I'll save that for another time) After being a race car driver for a little bit, I remembered I needed to make arrangements for the boys. I called my sister, told her what was happening and pretty much delegated her to be the contact with our parents, Mom and Dad & Step-Mom, and to find someone to watch the boys. My sister happens to be a nurse and has our dad's calmness when it comes to stressful situations, so she was the perfect person for these tasks.
By the time I was off the phone with her, I had just merged onto another interstate to get into Omaha, when I came up on a car who refused to get out of my way, even with my honking and flipping him off. Not only did this asshole purposely slow down, he also blocked me getting around him! Luckily for him, he ended up taking a different exit than me. **This is where I learned that when you see people flying down the road, weaving in & out of traffic, that they may truly have an emergency and are trying to get somewhere. Not everyone is an asshole driver, so now when I see those people coming, I make sure to get out of their way.** I flew up the entrance ramp to ER at the hospital, parked in the first open spot I saw and ran inside. His boss was sitting there in the waiting room and I was finally able to get the full story of what had happened.
His boss had gotten to the job site of the office building and called Wylie down off the scaffolding to talk to him about what needed to be done that night. He told me that while he was talking to Wylie, he saw his eyes kind of roll back and thought he was just being a smart ass, per usual. Wylie then fell back & started having a seizure. He had a dip in, so they tried to get that out so he wouldn't choke and called 911. On the ride to the hospital he was throwing up everywhere and in the ER room when he arrived. While his boss and I were talking, I got a phone call from a number I didn't know and it was the nurse from the ER. She told me, she thought she had my husband there and I needed to come to said hospital. She thought?? Had I not already been in the waiting room, I have no idea how I would of reacted to that phone call. I told her I was already there and she came to get us.
The ER nurse took us back to his room which smelled like vomit even though they had just cleaned it. She told me that Wylie had given her my full name: first, middle & last, along with my phone number and even showed me her hand she written it all down on. I was thinking this a good sign. Wylie was getting some kind of scan done, so they were asking us questions about what happened and what his normal demeanor was. They said he was awake and I assume they were trying to determine, how out of it he was. I wasn't quite sure how to answer that question, so she asked if he joked around. I said yes and he's a smart ass, which seemed to be what she wanted to know. She told me they thought he had a brain aneurysm. I had heard of those but wasn't exactly sure what it was. It's basically when a blood vessel in your vein bursts and it starts bleeding into your brain. She told me that her husband, (I think or someone she knew) had one, but they just had to get the swelling and bleeding to stop. He survived and was doing ok. So I'm thinking, alright this is fixable we may just be here for several days.
When they wheeled Wylie back in on the bed, it was a shock to me. He was only in his boxer briefs, tangled in the sheet (which actually is a common occurrence for him) and hooked up to all these wires and IV's. He was pale and smelled like vomit. It reminded of the times when he drank too much and ended up throwing up. He was talking, but definitely out of it and kept repeating that his head hurt. He knew who we were and was a being a smart ass like his normal self. Two men entered the room, who looked younger than me to give us the results. I must have had a skeptical expression on my face, b/c they explained they were residents or something but were in contact with the Head of the Nuerology Department. I'm fairly certain this is when they confirmed he did have a brain aneurysm and may have been bleeding in his brain. At this point in time, they were admitting him into ICU and would be moving him upstairs. While this was going on we were told to go to the waiting room. During all of this his Dad, Mom & Step-Dad and my sister had shown up. I was so thankful to have them all there. This is where my sister comes in handy, as being a nurse she could translate everything to me. (aka dumb it down to normal people language for me)
While we were waiting, another nurse gave me his cell phone and wallet. I then had to answer more questions. When they had him all settled in, we were finally allowed to go in. I believe at that point we all had to identify ourselves so they knew who they were dealing with. They explained what was going on and always seemed to be looking at me. It dawned on me at that time that I, as his wife, may be required to make medical decisions, but I brushed it off b/c he was going to be fine they could fix this. They would be watching him overnight and the Head Neurology guy would be in in the morning to do some tests. I didn't like that we had to wait and fairly certain I expressed that to her, but I couldn't do anything about it.
Throughout the night, Wylie would sleep off and on. When he woke up he was in pain with his head and would talk to us a little bit. They'd give him meds in intervals to help with the pain and whatever else he needed meds for. We all took turns rotating in and out of the room that evening. At some point his phone and my phone started going off with people asking if he was ok. I was bewildered as to how all these people knew anything had happened. I started to respond to some, but then decided I'd deal with it later as I just wanted to be with Wylie. I would find out later that a family member of his relation was at the hospital and posting about everything on Facebook. This family member and I did not see eye to eye at the time, nor were we friends on FB so I couldn't see what was being posted. I bring this up not to bad mouth them, but to illustrate a point. The amount of phone calls and texts I was receiving on his phone and mine were completely overwhelming once people saw this on FB. Not to mention trying to deal with those who were offended, that I had not notified them personally. Honestly the only thing on my mind was Wylie and making sure he was going to be ok. I had called his parents and after that it had not dawned on me to contact anyone else at this point. I found this article that describes what you should think about before posting on social media about the hospitalization or death of anyone. It is beyond accurate. **A lesson I hope that anyone who reads this will keep in mind and share with others.** **Also, for anyone who is ever in this situation and is offended that they did not get a personal phone call from the wife or main contact person you need to: #1) Take a step back and realize what they are going through. Their main focus is on their loved one who is in the hospital, not trying to call everyone they know; and #2) If you are not able to realize #1, do yourself a favor and never bring it up that you were offended. It's only going to build resentment between both of you for starters and you look like an asshole.**
I'm not sure if I should share this part, but what the hell, I said I'd be honest right?? During this night I had to make frequent trips to bathroom to "drop the kids off at the pool" as one of my friends would say. (If you don't know what that means, it's taking a shit.) I'd never had to go that much in one day and would later figure out it's how my body was reacting the stress I was under. It was literally trying to shit out the stress. So now you know, if you're under stress and have to take frequent shits it's a normal body reaction.
During one of these bathroom trips his mom and step-dad were in the room. Wylie had woken up, talked a little bit and made fun of his step-dad before dozing back off. I had come back and fallen asleep in the chair next to his bed. He started snoring, which to me sounded just like it does when he's congested or drunk. The nurse shouted his name a few times and he didn't respond. Then my sister, in her mom tone, shouted his name and still no response. I was confused, saying "What? He's just sleeping, that's how he snores." I should have known by the way my sister shouted that something wasn't right, but at the time I thought nothing of it. It was at this point the nurse told us to go to the waiting room so they could intubated him and they would call us when we could come back in. It took what seemed like forever. I'd made 2 or 3 calls checking to see if we could come back yet, which was a negative. When they finally called to say we could, we had to wait what felt like another 15 minutes at the ICU doors before they would open them. When I walked back into his room and saw him my gut told me this isn't right.
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Wylie when we first arrived at the Iowa Speedway. He was excited to DRIVE!
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By the time I was off the phone with her, I had just merged onto another interstate to get into Omaha, when I came up on a car who refused to get out of my way, even with my honking and flipping him off. Not only did this asshole purposely slow down, he also blocked me getting around him! Luckily for him, he ended up taking a different exit than me. **This is where I learned that when you see people flying down the road, weaving in & out of traffic, that they may truly have an emergency and are trying to get somewhere. Not everyone is an asshole driver, so now when I see those people coming, I make sure to get out of their way.** I flew up the entrance ramp to ER at the hospital, parked in the first open spot I saw and ran inside. His boss was sitting there in the waiting room and I was finally able to get the full story of what had happened.
His boss had gotten to the job site of the office building and called Wylie down off the scaffolding to talk to him about what needed to be done that night. He told me that while he was talking to Wylie, he saw his eyes kind of roll back and thought he was just being a smart ass, per usual. Wylie then fell back & started having a seizure. He had a dip in, so they tried to get that out so he wouldn't choke and called 911. On the ride to the hospital he was throwing up everywhere and in the ER room when he arrived. While his boss and I were talking, I got a phone call from a number I didn't know and it was the nurse from the ER. She told me, she thought she had my husband there and I needed to come to said hospital. She thought?? Had I not already been in the waiting room, I have no idea how I would of reacted to that phone call. I told her I was already there and she came to get us.
The ER nurse took us back to his room which smelled like vomit even though they had just cleaned it. She told me that Wylie had given her my full name: first, middle & last, along with my phone number and even showed me her hand she written it all down on. I was thinking this a good sign. Wylie was getting some kind of scan done, so they were asking us questions about what happened and what his normal demeanor was. They said he was awake and I assume they were trying to determine, how out of it he was. I wasn't quite sure how to answer that question, so she asked if he joked around. I said yes and he's a smart ass, which seemed to be what she wanted to know. She told me they thought he had a brain aneurysm. I had heard of those but wasn't exactly sure what it was. It's basically when a blood vessel in your vein bursts and it starts bleeding into your brain. She told me that her husband, (I think or someone she knew) had one, but they just had to get the swelling and bleeding to stop. He survived and was doing ok. So I'm thinking, alright this is fixable we may just be here for several days.
When they wheeled Wylie back in on the bed, it was a shock to me. He was only in his boxer briefs, tangled in the sheet (which actually is a common occurrence for him) and hooked up to all these wires and IV's. He was pale and smelled like vomit. It reminded of the times when he drank too much and ended up throwing up. He was talking, but definitely out of it and kept repeating that his head hurt. He knew who we were and was a being a smart ass like his normal self. Two men entered the room, who looked younger than me to give us the results. I must have had a skeptical expression on my face, b/c they explained they were residents or something but were in contact with the Head of the Nuerology Department. I'm fairly certain this is when they confirmed he did have a brain aneurysm and may have been bleeding in his brain. At this point in time, they were admitting him into ICU and would be moving him upstairs. While this was going on we were told to go to the waiting room. During all of this his Dad, Mom & Step-Dad and my sister had shown up. I was so thankful to have them all there. This is where my sister comes in handy, as being a nurse she could translate everything to me. (aka dumb it down to normal people language for me)
While we were waiting, another nurse gave me his cell phone and wallet. I then had to answer more questions. When they had him all settled in, we were finally allowed to go in. I believe at that point we all had to identify ourselves so they knew who they were dealing with. They explained what was going on and always seemed to be looking at me. It dawned on me at that time that I, as his wife, may be required to make medical decisions, but I brushed it off b/c he was going to be fine they could fix this. They would be watching him overnight and the Head Neurology guy would be in in the morning to do some tests. I didn't like that we had to wait and fairly certain I expressed that to her, but I couldn't do anything about it.
Throughout the night, Wylie would sleep off and on. When he woke up he was in pain with his head and would talk to us a little bit. They'd give him meds in intervals to help with the pain and whatever else he needed meds for. We all took turns rotating in and out of the room that evening. At some point his phone and my phone started going off with people asking if he was ok. I was bewildered as to how all these people knew anything had happened. I started to respond to some, but then decided I'd deal with it later as I just wanted to be with Wylie. I would find out later that a family member of his relation was at the hospital and posting about everything on Facebook. This family member and I did not see eye to eye at the time, nor were we friends on FB so I couldn't see what was being posted. I bring this up not to bad mouth them, but to illustrate a point. The amount of phone calls and texts I was receiving on his phone and mine were completely overwhelming once people saw this on FB. Not to mention trying to deal with those who were offended, that I had not notified them personally. Honestly the only thing on my mind was Wylie and making sure he was going to be ok. I had called his parents and after that it had not dawned on me to contact anyone else at this point. I found this article that describes what you should think about before posting on social media about the hospitalization or death of anyone. It is beyond accurate. **A lesson I hope that anyone who reads this will keep in mind and share with others.** **Also, for anyone who is ever in this situation and is offended that they did not get a personal phone call from the wife or main contact person you need to: #1) Take a step back and realize what they are going through. Their main focus is on their loved one who is in the hospital, not trying to call everyone they know; and #2) If you are not able to realize #1, do yourself a favor and never bring it up that you were offended. It's only going to build resentment between both of you for starters and you look like an asshole.**
I'm not sure if I should share this part, but what the hell, I said I'd be honest right?? During this night I had to make frequent trips to bathroom to "drop the kids off at the pool" as one of my friends would say. (If you don't know what that means, it's taking a shit.) I'd never had to go that much in one day and would later figure out it's how my body was reacting the stress I was under. It was literally trying to shit out the stress. So now you know, if you're under stress and have to take frequent shits it's a normal body reaction.
During one of these bathroom trips his mom and step-dad were in the room. Wylie had woken up, talked a little bit and made fun of his step-dad before dozing back off. I had come back and fallen asleep in the chair next to his bed. He started snoring, which to me sounded just like it does when he's congested or drunk. The nurse shouted his name a few times and he didn't respond. Then my sister, in her mom tone, shouted his name and still no response. I was confused, saying "What? He's just sleeping, that's how he snores." I should have known by the way my sister shouted that something wasn't right, but at the time I thought nothing of it. It was at this point the nurse told us to go to the waiting room so they could intubated him and they would call us when we could come back in. It took what seemed like forever. I'd made 2 or 3 calls checking to see if we could come back yet, which was a negative. When they finally called to say we could, we had to wait what felt like another 15 minutes at the ICU doors before they would open them. When I walked back into his room and saw him my gut told me this isn't right.
**Are lessons that I have learned throughout this experience and would like to share with you.
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